Which desires are truly yours?

- August 17, 2026

‎Which desires are truly mine?

‎I hope I can answer this one.

‎"Tell me your deepest desires" Sounds familiar? Yeah, it's a line from a Tv Series.

‎But if you were to answer that, how sure are you that the desires are yours, and not someone else's?

‎How sure are you that the person who wants these things is you, and not someone else whispering it into your ears through the voice of Instagram reels, Pinterest boards, targeted ads, friends, societal expectations, and social media influencers?

‎You know those things you never thought or knew you wanted until you saw someone else own it or use it or until it was expected of you?

‎Let me digress a little.

Yesterday in church, our pastor preached about consecration.

Highlighting 1John 2:16.

‎[16] For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.

‎The Lust of The Eyes.

‎I have struggled with this for a long time without even realizing that I was lusting with my eyes.

‎I see a beautiful hairstyle, and immediately mentally tell myself that I'll make it someday.

‎I see a beautiful dress, and I immediately remember that I don't have enough and must get more, that one especially. It would look great on me.

‎I start to desire them.

‎I knew that I had needs. I knew that I had areas where I wanted provision and supply or a change in lifestyle, but I didn't desire them that much until I saw them on others. And now the desires not only came as thoughts, they had pictures.

‎Let's go back to the beginning.

‎When I say that I desire a good life..

‎A thriving career in writing, public speaking, acting, and media entrepreneurship, those are MY desires.

‎I have had them since before I even had any external influence on my opinions and decisions.

‎I loved writing essays in school.

‎I have addressed the assembly since I was 9 years old, all through till I graduated high school.

‎I have acted in the school drama, church drama, and a few films since I was 8, until now. Still doing it.

‎So being a storyteller or public speaker wasn't a desire that came because of the quest for fame or visibility, it was a gift, a thing I enjoyed and I want to nourish until it blooms.

‎However,

things started to go sideways, sometimes not moving at all, and my life took a detour. For reasons I cannot place my finger on.

‎Maybe fear, maybe God was asking me to wait and grow, maybe I wasn't doing something I was supposed to, either or all of these reasons.

‎Because of that, a friend suggested I took a tech course. It would make me some money, he said to me, and so I did.

‎My darling, I have lagged in over 4 weeks of classes, and no matter how hard I try, I seem to be farther and more uninterested than the last time.

‎Do I desire to make money? Yes.

‎But is this tech course my desire? No.

‎Could that be why I seem to be lagging at it? Absolutely.

‎Which of your desires are truly yours?

‎It may not be a course.

A decision.

‎It may even be an opinion.

A lifestyle.

‎Do you really dislike light skinned men or you just think so because the people on X say so?

‎Do you really like to wear those short skirts or you just feel left out from your peers if you don't?

‎Do you really like alcohol or you are just afraid of because called a sissy if you don't?

‎Do you truly desire marriage or is there an unhealed part of you that's looking for a safety net to match on to so you don't bother about fixing yourself, or because society expects it of you?

‎Are you truly a fan of shawarma or you just think it's cool because many people are and it's weird if you don't?

‎It can be difficult to be true to yourself in a society where the majority is the loudest and claim to be the most correct or the standard.

‎A lot of us have taken or are taking paths that aren't ours.

‎Agreed or are agreeing with thoughts, opinions that aren't ours.

‎It's reshaping us.

‎And the worst part is, it's disappearing us.

‎We are losing our authenticity.

‎Every choice is now influenced by a tiktok post, every opinion is influenced by an X post and even our mistakes are endorsed by someone on the internet.

‎And our dress sense is influenced by a group of people who think we are 'cringe' if we dress the way we truly desire, so we do otherwise and desire to 'be like them'.

‎But find time to recognize exactly which thoughts, desires, and path is yours.

‎Because otherwise, in no distant time, you'll resent yourself for following a bandwagon, and when you look at yourself in the mirror, you realize how unrecognizable you have become, and hopefully it's not too late to come back to yourself.